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That Time I Found a Snake in My Closet

I had just gotten out of the shower and was opening my closet to decide what to wear. My sister Beth and I were going to Providence for a boat tour and a day of strolling the waterfront and stopping in any cafe with a delicious window display. That's where my head was when I saw something on the middle of my closet floor and automatically stooped to pick it up. Is that the string of my sweats? What is it doing on the floor? Before I could even finish the thought it started to move and that's when I realized it wasn't a clothing item but a snake. In my closet.
Realizing it was only a little garden snake, probably harmless and more scared of me than I was of him, I picked him up by the tail and proceeded to walk him outside and set him free in the lawn where he could startle someone else. 
Just kidding. I lost my shit.
OhmyGodofmyGodohmyGod! There's a snake in my closet! I started panicking immediately. First of all, what the fuck. Second of all, seriously, what the fuck. H…

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