Falling With Style

Brent and I started drinking at 2pm on Saturday. We figured we owed it to the bar crawl. Drink early, drink often, that’s what we say. I don’t know why I thought I could hang w/ a full onslaught of day drinking. Needless to say, Sunday was filled w/ greasy food and closed blinds. 

I’m using the term “crawl” pretty loosely here. Unless you count the condo and the food court at Faneuil Hall as stops on the crawl. Technically, we did imbibe at both places. 

We went as Buzz and Jesse, and I have to admit, I was a little jealous of all the attention B got. Everyone knows who Buzz Lightyear is. Jesse is a little less known. This one girl I talked to hadn’t even seen the second and third Toy Story’s. She thought I was just some rando cowgirl. 

Part of that was my fault, I suppose. I didn’t have Jesse’s signature braid or badass belt buckle. There’s only so far a $20 Halloween budget will take you. Even less so when most of that is allotted for alcohol. 

I kept saying “There’s a snake in my boot!” And then B would gently remind me that was Woody’s line. So then I’d shout “To infinity and beyond!” Which would only draw attention to us, and everyone was all, “Buzz Lightyear! Yeah man!” Was it any surprise I had to console myself w/ pizza beer? 

I’m not normally an attention whore. I don’t usually want strangers looking at me, much less talking to me while I’m at a bar and trying to get drunk enjoy myself. But Halloween is different. Put people in costume, and I have no boundaries. I chat up everyone about their costume. Is it too much to ask for a little reciprocation? 

Although, I guess I should be glad no one called me out on being a boring old cowgirl. The old adage “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all” doesn’t apply on Halloween bar crawls. The Monopoly man sure got an earful from me about the fact that he didn’t have a moustache. I mean, what is this, amateur hour?