Pouches, Please

That’s all.

I mean, what can you say about an adorable animal picture like that? If seeing that little wallaby plant a smooch on the baby ‘roo doesn’t warm your heart, well then I don’t think we can be friends. Or maybe it’s the wombat that’s doing the smooching? I can’t really tell.

Doesn't the word "marsupial" brings back all kinds of fourth grade science lessons? Maybe if I had paid a little more attention back then, I’d know which animal was which. Good thing Wiki can clarify:

"Marsupials are an infraclass of mammals living primarily in the Southern Hemisphere; a distinctive characteristic, common to most species, is that the young are carried in a pouch."

If I’m going to be honest here, if my mom had a pouch, I’d probably still be in it. Being warm and immobile all day? Hell yes. 

I tell ya, I wouldn’t mind having a pouch. That shit would come in so handy. No more lugging around purses and totes; just throw it in your pouch and you’re good to go. You'd be nice and streamlined. Neck and back problems would virtually disappear. Chiropractors and back specialists would go out of business. Pharmaceutical companies that mass produce pain relievers would lose millions.

And then what would we do w/out their junk science and harmful drugs?

I kid, I kid. I saw a chiropractor earlier in the year. My back pain just happened to increase exponentially. No hard feelings or anything.