A Terribly Lit Kitchen Tour

With April coming to a close, so does my experiment of picking a topic and expounding on it in more detail than anyone ever asked for. Now that you're literate in kitchen lingo and vetoed culinary school as a viable career option, I decided to conclude with the piece de resistance: a tour of my home kitchen.

A few years ago when we were looking to buy a house, we knew exactly what we wanted and didn't want. Like any good house hunters, we handed our wishlist, printed and laminated, to our realtor, with a note saying, show us one popcorn ceiling and we walk. Just kidding! We love popcorn ceilings, as evidenced by our current house. 

Unlike the dopes on HGTV who can't get over their hatred of pedestal sinks or look past the dated wallpaper, we knew we'd likely be compromising with the home we ended up with. One room I wasn't willing to compromise an inch? The kitchen. I insisted on a large island and gas heating, sorry not sorry. 

Note the peninsula and electric range that are serving me just fine. Is this the kitchen of my dreams? Um, no, did you see the electric range? While I don't love my kitchen, I certainly love things about it: the double oven, the bright red walls, the ample cabinet space. There's no island, but I really like the peninsula. I like to pretend we're boogie and call it the breakfast bar. 

Brent: Where did you put my mail from the other day?
Me: It's on the breakfast bar.
Brent: What? Where?
Me: The breakfast bar.
Brent: What are you saying?
Me: (through clenched teeth) The. Breakfast. Bar
Brent: Oh, it's right here. Why didn't you say it was on the peninsula?
Me: Get out of my kitchen.

It's a good thing I'm not a realtor, because there's no way these pictures would sell a house. It's actually a cute space, at least I think so. My favorite part might be this wall, which let me be clear, is NOT a gallery wall. I hate gallery walls. 

in case you can't see the writing due to the poor quality of this picture, the puns on the farthest two are"everyday I'm brusselin" and "slice slice baby"

I smile every time I look at these hilarious kitchen puns. If you want a fun, lighthearted DIY project that will bring you and your partner closer together while simultaneously beautifying your kitchen, I don't recommend framing and hanging artwork. But if you really want to test your relationship and save some money, I'd say go for it.