Yule Love This

Last Friday was feeling a little tropical around these parts (it might have even reached gasp 40 degrees) so Brent and I decided to celebrate w/ some bar hopping. Besides celebrating the solstice and the shortest days of the year behind us, I was also celebrating that fact that I didn’t have work Saturday. Which then led to way to many celebratory toasts over things normal people don’t even acknowledge, but that’s just how we roll.

We started at this cute little place called the 21st Amendment. Suck on that, prohibition! Brent was trying all these fancy drink concoctions, but I stuck w/ my old faithful: Bud Light. Nothing like that watery goodness to start lining your stomach to prepare for a night of bar crawling. I had been texting my friend earlier in the day and we planned on meeting up, so I told her next we were going to go to our place. Our place meaning Brent’s and mine, which is a little dive down some shady ass alley that plays great music and gives you a generous serving of nachos. We were more than a little shocked to see all the booths filled up and were not about to stand at the bar at our place, so we said sayonara. 

Three bars later, we finally found one where we could sit and order nachos in peace. But instead of nachos we got cheese fries and the hummus platter and I texted my friend the change of plans. She texted me she was held up w/ colleagues and to send help immediately. So I texted my friend who works at an office just around the corner and comes to this place all the time. What are the chances she was at her holiday party at her office just around the corner? She told me Brent and I should come and then she made us an offer we couldn’t refuse: free alcohol. Actually, it was an offer Brent could easily refuse. He insisted it was going to be weird and I insisted the free alcohol would prove otherwise and he was like, Brig, it’s weird and I was like Brent you never crashed house parties in college? and he’s like Brig, we’re not in college anymore and then I was like, why would you say such a mean thing to me?

Somehow I convinced him to come w/ me for just one drink (wink). There I was, on the elevator up to my friends office, smugly thinking I’d won, when the elevator opened to the buffet and alcohol table before us and I knew it was going to be just as awkward as Brent thought. Before even finding my friend, I made Brent and I take a shot and make drinks. I thought the Christmas colored sugar crusted rims were a nice touch until I sipped from my glass and almost cracked a tooth on the sugar.

The drinks helped take the edge off and we joined everyone in the conference room, where someone immediately asked what nationality I was. I instantly liked this dude b/c this never happens to me. It’s always Brent w/ his smooth olive skin that makes people like, wait is your boo mixed or Middle Eastern or what? So I was like, Columbian har har, and he didn’t get my joke and was like oh, I thought you were Russian and proceeded to call me Red Sonja all night. So then I got really into it and kept shouting “Dosvedanya!” in my best Anastasia voice. 

After draining all their alcohol it became clear this crew wasn’t much into drinking games (or me) so I said “Dosvedanya bitches!” and we hightailed it out of there (hmm, maybe I should text my friend to make sure we're all good). 

Next we went to the bar my other friend was at so I could save her from work happy hour. Happy hour apparently went well past 7 and the tab was on the company’s account, so Brent and I cozied up and ordered a few beers (and maybe swiped a slice of the pizza going around; I used to work there, so I didn’t feel too bad about it). After more than a few Bud Lights it was clear my friend was in no shape to bar hop (or probably just had more sense than B and I did). So she went to the train and we went to our next locale. 

Any place where the bartender offers you complimentary chips is okay w/ me. Especially when they’re thick cut kettle chips and all you can eat. Well, he said they were all you can eat, but I don’t think he expected me to keep asking, and certainly not to eat them all myself (Brent doesn’t like kettle chips, more for me sucka). I was drunkenly intrigued w/ the drink mixers out on display on the bar and tried to pocket one for my stolen glass collection, but Brent told me to put it down, there was someone watching me. So then I had to put it down and pick all the others up like I was just admiring the handiwork; fooling no one and getting us out of there after one drink (and three bowls of chips).

For our next stop we picked an empty bar, which seemed like a good idea until I ordered a horrible drink and the bartender was all excited to see how I liked it and I wasn't very good at pretending. It was at this point in the night drunk surly Brig was beginning to make her appearance and Brent knew he had to do something fast. So he got me a food menu and it was smooth sailing from there. Besides the drink being a flop, the bar was a good time. The buffalo mac n’ cheese was bomb and the bartender was practically a kindred spirit; she went to culinary school and had all these great stories about her time working as a cater waiter. 

Annnnnnd, my only picture from the night, when I texted my friend to show her was she was missing.

The only picture until we got home and I saw the package in my foyer w/ my name on it. Which I just had to snap a picture of b/c how cute is this packaging? Even the next day, sober as a skunk, I was pretty infatuated. Thanks, AE, for making my holiday a little brighter.

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