To Be Clear: I Don't Hate Boxed Wine (and shouldn't blog under such influence)
When my parents visited this weekend, the first item they busted out wasn't my mail that had been piling up at the house, or the shoes I'd been asking about since my move here...instead it was a giant box of wine. I don't think I've had Franzia since last year college. And I have to admit, I was a little embarrassed that was what they brought.
Usually when my parents visit, they are on point about asking what type of alcohol they can bring. Our fridge is stocked w/ Bud Light, Blue Light (an upstate NY classic) and Molson (my dad's Canadian beer of choice) among others, thanks to my parents. We have enough ingredients to pound car bombs til the cows come home.
But their latest visit, I didn't get the standard alcohol query.
Which is fine w/ me. I'm technically an "adult." I should be able to afford my own alcohol ("should" being the operative word there). I mean, if they're going to offer, I'm going to take them up on that. But if they don't, I'm not about to give suggestions voluntarily. Which brings us to the Franzia incident of '13.
ONE TIME, when I was a senior in college and my dad came to pick me up for winter break, he opened my fridge (so he could put HIS beer to keep it cold, I might add) and a bulbous bag of a box of wine may have fallen out at his feet. I haven't been able to live this moment down.
I'm not a snob. I don't think I'm too good for any type of alcohol (except Red Dog. That shit is NtotheAtotheStotheTtotheY). Boxed wine isn't beneath me, by any means. It just brings up a lapse in judgement. Or twelve. Like the time I fell asleep on the train w/ said box, misplacing my wallet and phone, but MAKING DAMN SURE that box of wine made it home w/ me. Or the time I bought an entire Franzia for a quaint housewarming party of about 10 people and ended up w/ chugging from the spout to prove that a box of wine fit in w/ any decor #classy
The truth is, I dig it; the fact that my parents know just how much we drink...and are economical to boot. I can only hope I inherit such savviness.
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