Flowers 101

I’ve never been all that into getting flowers. Sure, I guess a bouquet is a nice change of pace every now and then, but it doesn’t make me all swoony. Gimme chocolates over flowers all day, err day. 

For the past few years, when I was working in an office, Brent would send me flowers for Valentine’s Day. This year, no office, no flowers. But I did come home to a sweet Edible Arrangement last Friday. Which I’d much prefer; does B know his audience or what? 

Maybe it’s because I’ve never tried my hand at gardening. My mom has plants all over their house and always gets seasonal flowers come May, but I guess the green thumb stopped w/ her, b/c I don’t think any of my sisters and I are really into that. It just seems like a lot of time and work for a few blossoms I can enjoy on the walk to the bus, you know?

Know what else is a lot of time and work? Fake flowers.




We were playing around w/ fondant and gum paste in one of my classes last week and my dream of ever becoming a cake decorator was killed faster than it takes for me to die in Flappy Birds (which is pathetically fast). Just kidding, I don’t want to be a cake decorator. Dealing w/ Bridezillas and moms who have nothing better to do than haggle over the price of their darling’s first birthday cake? Saw enough of that at the bakery, thankyouverymuch. 

It was so cool to jump right in, and astounding to learn the detail that goes into these. The amount of time it took me to make my flowers was cray. To give you an idea, the class is four hours. And my work after the four hours? Summed up below.


Remember that when you’re trying to get a cake on the cheap. Beautiful cakes don’t come off the assembly line in some third world sweat shop like Kardashion Kollection merch. They’re made of quality materials and take an actual eye for design. And at nearly four hours of labor a pop, these babies would make for one awfully expensive cake. I'd suggest that if you order a cake from me to avoid carnations; those pink flaps of fondant in the upper left aren't what I'd want all over my cake, but that's just me.

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