I Didn't Sign Up For This

Why the hell did I think it was a good idea to go back to school? Two weeks into the new semester (not even a full two weeks b/c of MLK day and a snow day and it’s not even freaking Friday yet) and I’m ready to hang up my apron and call it a day. 

This frustration isn’t anything new. But I still don’t get it. I’m probably the best partner you could have. I’m smart, competent and uber responsible. Not tooting my own horn here, just keeping it real. If I wanted to toot my own horn, I’d add cooler things, like can slam a car bomb in five seconds, or knows how to pose in a picture so her arm isn’t enormous Norman. I digress.

I knew it was going to be a rotten class after I was paired w/ the girl who thought a pound was 32 ounces. I’m no math whiz, but it doesn’t take a genius to memorize some measurements. So don’t give me attitude about this when two minutes ago you were convinced we couldn’t measure eggs on a balance scale. Girrrrrl, you trippin’. After going back and forth and back and forth and asking the girls working next to us, this chick finally admits measurements aren’t her thing. No shit.

One of the recipes we did was for tea cookies. Neither of us are highly skilled at piping cookies, but they blend in fine w/ the rest of the products our classmates make. Until my partner decided that my cookies were too high and scooped them back into the bowl to pipe out herself. Don’t touch my cookies when your own are shit. 

I had to walk away from this chick so I went to the sink to help w/ dishes. Where shit really hit the fan.

First, some trick comes back w/ bowls and whisks and spoons coated in jelly, proceeds to put them in a bin to run through the dishwasher, and stroll on back to her station. Um, what? You put them in upside down. How the hell is the water going to get in the bowl and clean out the sticky gritty mess that is your jelly? There’s really no way to tell someone to do something w/out coming off like an asshole; this is supposedly an advanced class, so I can’t be like, you know you have to rinse your shit before you run it through the dishwasher w/out coming off like a know-it-all. Sorry that I know it all.

Later I go to get a broom and start sweeping. The jelly moron literally gets a broom and starts sweeping directly behind me. What the what? There’s a whole other side to the bakeshop, go sweep over there. Better yet, start mopping or emptying the trash or anything else that needs to get done.

The girl who offered to go down and get the mop cart seemed to think an elevator ride w/ the mop cart excluded her from doing any real work and immediately went to chat up a group of girls standing around doing nothing. Leaving the mopping to me, apparently the only one who wanted to get out of class on time. Even though we didn’t b/c all that standing around really interferes w/ cleaning and efficiency.

Before I started this post I made a list of all the annoying shit that happened in class today. The rant above? Covers about half of it.